Full-Time Dads;
The E-Magazine for Caregiver Fathers
Issue 3, originally appeared in print - August 1991
With a new school year beginning, it's a good time to step back for a minute and think about the ways in which children are educated in our society and about the role that parents play in that process. Over the past hundred years or so, education has become increasingly professionalized and institutionalized, and parents have been encouraged to play less and less of a role in the education of their children. The recent trend has been to turn children over to the educational institution at the age of five (if not sooner) and to let the professionals take over from that point while the parents get on with their lives. However, not all parents have adopted such a passive approach; many insist on remaining actively involved in the education of their children. That involvement takes on many forms.
We all help our children learn in many ways- both before and after they enter school. Parents are naturally attuned to the needs of their children and to their highly individualized learning styles. With guidance from their parents, children accomplish amazing feats of learning in the first five years of life; they learn all kinds of complex relationships between people and things in their world and they learn to communicate with that world, complex tasks but ones which are necessary for survival.
As our children grow, it is necessary to take the information we have gathered about them (and about ourselves) to make decisions about how their learning should continue as they move into the years of compulsory education. What is the best educational setting for our children? Certainly, this depends, in part, on what is available in the areas in which we live and on our ability to afford the costs of certain types of education. But it is important, even if we feel that our options are limited, to understand the various approaches to education which exist. Only then can we make an informed decision for our children.
There are a number of educational options available for children today. There are the local public schools, public schools in other school districts ( this option may not be available in all parts of the country and may involve paying tuition), traditional private schools, and child-centered approaches to education such as Montessori and Waldorf education. There are also alternative schools which emphasize importance of children in making decisions about their education even from a very early age and many, many small schools started by groups of parents to provide just the mix of educational approaches which appeals to them. And last, but not least, there is the option of home education- the continuation into the compulsory education years of the learning process which has been taking place since our children were born.
How can parents best gain information about the various educational options in order to determine which is most appropriate for their children? They can read about different approaches to education in general with other parents and with those who are not parents. They can think about their own educational experiences. What did they like about them and what did they dislike? They can visit various types of schools, both public and private,and they can attend meetings of parent groups for a particular school and/or of a local home education support group. Parents are being asked to make decisions which will seriously affect their children's lives. Schools and other parents should give them all the information they need to make those decisions.
Parental involvement doesn't stop when one of the educational option s is finally decided on. If that option is home education or participation in a small parent-run school, the continuing involvement is obvious. When parents choose one of the other educational options, their continued involvement in their children's education is perhaps less obvious, but no less important. Most children will, at one time or another, need someone to advocate for them in what may be the impersonal atmosphere of a large institution. In order to do that effectively, parents must keep in touch with what is happening in school, how their children feel about school, how the teacher treats the child, etc. It is also most helpful for parents to understand the school's decision making process and the most effective ways to approach the school staff to assure that the needs of their children are met.
Another area for parental involvement is in the implementation of educational reform at the local level. There is a great deal of attention at the state and national levels to various approaches to educational reform. Parental involvement is a major theme in many reform efforts. Parents can volunteer to serve on local committees which are considering changes in school or school district policies. If no such committees exist, parents can organize and approach the school authorities with their ideas about how the school might b made friendlier and more accommodating places for children and about how the schools and parents might work together in helping children learn.
Parents are frequently shy about approaching school authorities. This shyness is often a result of their own schooling experiences in which many were well taught that the schools are not places in which they were given much say about what was taking place. After thirteen years of "being educated" by professionals, people often come to the conclusion that they are not competent to participate actively in the education of their children.
This, of course, is ridiculous. Parents are the individuals most knowledgeable about their children and the ways they learn. Even more important, they care about their children in ways that are just not possible for school staff (even though many teachers and administrators are dedicated and caring individuals). Because parents have a unique and critically important role to play in the education of their children, it is necessary that those who send their to school overcome any inhibitions they have concerning contact with school authorities. After all, the future of our children is at stake, and as Shari Lewis writes in the Forward to Thomas Armstrongs new book Awakening Your Child's Natural Genius ( Jeremy P. Tarcher, Inc. 1991), "kids are still our best source of adults."
Copyright 1991 By Seth Rockmueller
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