Full-Time Dads;
The E-Magazine for Caregiver Fathers
Issue 4, originally appeared in print - October 1991
The various roles of any parent are endless. The number of roles are varied for each parent and are modified frequently with changing ages of children and other conditions. Some roles involve direct care giving, other involve role modeling while still others involve financial management and diplomatic skills.
One group of roles involves physical care and includes such tasks as diaper changing, bathing and health care. A concurrent set concerns the single parent's role as peace officer. Peace officer duties include, but are not limited to protecting the child and property own by the family and in some cases the property of others from the child. The mediation of disputes often proves time consuming especially when the single parent has multiple children.
Social chair is another duty a parent is normally assigned by the point at which the child enters school if such has not previously been assigned. Such a role begins with formulating car pools and in general providing transportation. With increasing age this role is greatly expanded and the desirability of having a secretarial staff and receptionist as assistants frequently occurs to the single parent.
Educational liaison person has been previously described in earlier editions of Fuil-Time Dads. The single parent is constantly required to teach, set example and demonstrate. A parent is expected to provide cultural enrichment and moral training by helping to broaden his children's understanding of both the culture of the group of which the child is a member, but also other cultural groups.
Counselor is a related duty for which the full-time parent is frequently needed--for the children as well as for others. A frequent question is "How do you manage to ..." asked by a parent who has a full time partner and often only one of which has a full-time job and neither takes a very active part in community affairs.
Cook, nutritional supervisor and chief bottle washer is a role frequently denoted in the literature related to parental duties. This role rivals the twin duty depicted as being chief of maintenance and maid.
Community activist / volunteer is a role equal in importance. As a responsibility of good citizenship, a person is expected to vote, be involved in community affairs and in general seek to make the world a better place on which to live for their children and others. A parent would be remiss if they failed to be involved in this area and model such behavior.
Financial responsibilities are a major part of the duty of any parent. A responsible parent is expected to provide financially for his children so that under normal conditions public assistance will not be required. As a portion of this responsibility, the parent should provide ample disability insurance for himself, life insurance to anticipate possible future needs and in general provide investment income so that his children will not be dependent on others financially in case of the disability or death of the parent. As part of this broad area, the parent should ensure sufficient investment income so that post secondary training/education will be available so that his children have the opportunity to achieve to their maximum potential. In order to avoid stifling their own children in the children's adult life, the parent will need to provide for the parents' own retirement so the parent can avoid becoming a financial drain on their adult children.
The duties previously described are a partial list of the roles of a parent. The author believes that they are goals for each parent. A final goal of importance equal to the previous list, but one that many single parents have the most difficulty achieving is to set an example of being fair to the children's other parent, working with the other parent and family in helping one's children reach their maximum potential.
Copyright 1991 William H. Barber
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